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September 3, 2012
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and I know ... I'll never wake up by NikolasBrummer and I know ... I'll never wake up by NikolasBrummer
we've lost the touch to reality. we fall in love with strangers, picturing their stories and minds as we please. we start dancing in the streets as at the times we felt no one was watching. we attach to things so easily; to that pen we use everyday to put down our thoughts into words, to that bracelet we got on that trip where we felt everlasting, to that person we met just yesterday and who we can't get our mind off. we're dying and coming alive again with the characters in the books we read, we hold them to our breasts and say "this is me black on white". our mood changes within a second when the first line of this specific song comes on. we lie in the high grass watching the clouds, but they are not clouds. this is a lion and that over there is a kissing couple. we put a life and a mind in every little thing we see; these sparks rising towards the sky long to be part of the stars, this branch got mad at our ignorance and wanted to hit us in the knee, our cat is hurt by our absence for the last couple of days and of course it won't speak to us now. we sit in the car and rest our head against the window as though our lives were a movie and we just departed from our significant other. we prefer the dark because it leaves place for our own imagination; still we are afraid of it. we see things and we try to understand. we don't live life. we see it, we taste it, we smell it, we hear it, we breathe it … we grasp it with out tiny fingers, trying to hold onto every little second and every flick of an eye. we're disillusioned from everything that is, but still we feel as if we are the part of something big. we're never lonely because we constantly share company with our thoughts. we cry and we smile, and we don't understand so many things. but we try to. we don't know what we want and who we want to be, but still we walk along the alley knowing with a clear destination set in mind. at the same time we are free like the wind, vibrant as the stormy ocean, tender like the sunrise in the morning and sticky like resin to everything around us.

we'll never change the way we are, but inside of us, we are changing everyday. and eventually, we are okay with that. because we never know what is ahead of us and we are too curious to feel fear.


souls, written a week ago.

(day fifteen)

preach it; our art is free - join THE ART WARRIORS
photography & edit (c) me
model: myself.
equipment used: canon eos 1000D & canon 50mm f/1.4; tripod
facebook fanpage

    do not use my photos without my written permission!
Add a Comment:
 
:iconfilka1997dima:
filka1997dima Featured By Owner Edited Nov 3, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Es ist eine wunderbare Arbeit ! Deine Bilder begeistern !!
Reply
:iconlunafeles:
LunaFeles Featured By Owner Mar 10, 2013   Photographer
featured your photo here: [link]
:heart:
Reply
:iconlunafeles:
LunaFeles Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2013   Photographer
genial...
ich muss echt öfters in deiner Galerie vorbeischauen...
Reply
:iconlisacheesa:
LisaCheesa Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Das sieht richtig toll aus :squee:
Gefällt mir gut xD
Reply
:iconmondglimmer:
Mondglimmer Featured By Owner Oct 7, 2012   Writer
[link] :D

Ich hoffe, es ist nicht zu strange geraten. ;)
Reply
:iconnishitokyogirl:
NishitokyoGirl Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2012  Student Writer
Wow, Nikolas! Ich frage mich gerade, wie ich das tolle Foto übersehen konnte :D. Aber zum Glück gibt's ja immer noch Beau. :heart:
Reply
:icondragonfly-oli:
dragonfly-oli Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Hello.
You are one of our finalists of the "Featured"-folder in :iconbreathtaking-photos:!
[link]
If you win, you will be featured the whole next week!
:hug:
Reply
:iconbeaucyphre:
BeauCyphre Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2012  Professional Writer
Auf der anderen Seite öffnete Keoma die Augen. Er hatte lange und tief geschlafen, doch jetzt fühlte er die Kraft der aufgehenden Sonne in seinen Adern. In der Ferne sah er eine gewaltige Rauchsäule zum Himmel steigen, und die Laute des Dschungels waren überwältigend.
Es war Zeit für die Jagd, und er überließ sich dem Ganzen, um seine Beute zu finden.
Wenn er sich auf diese Weise bewegte, war es, als ob die Atemluft selbst ihn befähigte, schneller, wacher und tödlicher zu sein als die Lebewesen in seiner Umgebung.
In seltenen Augenblicken spürte er etwas Neues, etwas, das vorher noch nicht da war. Früher hatte er dieses Gefühl ausschließlich mit CORAZON in Verbindung gebracht, und wenn er träumte, konnte er sie immer noch sehen, das Glitzern ihrer langen Haare im Sonnenlicht und ihr unglaublich sinnliches Lächeln, das sofort seine Begierde anstachelte. Es war unmittelbar, dass er sie nehmen wollte, fühlen wollte, wie es war, in ihr zu sein, und alleine die Erinnerung an Tania verschaffte ihm eine Erektion, die ihn vor Lust aufstöhnen ließ.
Ihre Identität mit CORAZON war eine unbegreifliche Tatsache, und schmerzlich wurde ihm bewusst, dass es eine Zeit gab, als dieser unerbittliche Herzschlag im INNEREN KREIS für eine Katastrophe sorgte, die so folgerichtig war wie der nächste Atemzug.
Aber andere Dinge blieben im Dunkeln, und es fiel ihm schwer, sich auch nur annähernd zu erinnern, zu wissen, was gestern und heute war.

Warum konnte er sich nicht erinnern, was in dem Turm der Flammen geschehen war? Wieso hatte er nur den Geruch des Mädchens, aber keine wirkliche Erinnerung an sie? Etwas lag hinter ihnen, am Horizont immer noch sichtbar: Der schwarze Rauch stieg zum Himmel und verlor sich in Höhen, in denen kein Vogel mehr fliegen konnte.
Aber es war eine völlig andere Welt, ein völlig anderes Leben, und nichts würde ihm diese Welt zurückbringen. Keoma fühlte eine Traurigkeit, die er sich nicht erklären konnte, und er hörte Schreie, die von Geistern der Toten stammten. Er sah sie auf die Ausgänge zudrängen, aber alle Ausgänge waren Fallen: Es gab keinen Weg nach unten. Er öffnete die Augen, um die Bilder zu verdrängen, aber er konnte nicht klar sehen, alles war verschwommen. Er bekam kaum Luft, und der Schmerz war so groß, dass er die Tränen nicht mehr zurückhalten konnte. Keoma sank auf die Knie, und auf dieser Lichtung des ihm noch unbekannten Dschungels lag er zusammengekrümmt da, so verletzlich und angreifbar wie noch nie zuvor in seinem Leben.
Doch der Wind stand günstig, und nichts hatte seine Witterung aufgenommen.


Als er wieder aufwachte, hatten sich die Dinge verändert, und die dunklen Träume der Vergangenheit schienen ihn endgültig zu verlassen. Hier war ein anderes Leben, und er brauchte keinen Blick in sein Spiegelbild, um zu wissen, dass nun alles neu war auf dieser Seite jenseits des Turms. Einen Augenblick lang glaubte er dennoch, sich selbst sehen zu können, aber dieses Wesen, das er visuell wahrnahm, war ihm so fremd, dass er sich vollkommen in das zurückzog, was er fühlte. Und was er nun fühlte, war ein angeborenes Wissen, das lange ganz tief in ihm verschüttet war, und der Atem der Dinge trug ihn weit über das Dach des Dschungels, um ihm nicht nur den Weg, sondern auch die Schatten abseits des Weges zu zeigen, die ihm gefährlich werden konnten.
Er hatte keine Worte für den Gegenstand, den er in der Hand trug, lediglich eine Erinnerung, die eine Ahnung vermittelte (Traumfänger), sich aber doch falsch anfühlte, weil er nun sicher sein konnte, dass das Wort Träume auf einem uralten Aberglauben beruhte, einem Bedürfnis nach Sicherheit, die auf keiner Seite der Wirklichkeit jemals vorhanden war. Er wusste auch nicht, was er instinktiv mit seinem Gesicht und dem Kleid des von ihm roh verschlungenen Vogels gemacht hatte in der Nacht, doch er hörte nun Stimmen, die er nie zuvor gehört hatte, und er fühlte sich leichter als jemals zuvor. Er würde weiter gehen, solange er atmen konnte und solange sein Herz schlug. Alles andere würde sich zeigen.
Reply
:icondragonfly-oli:
dragonfly-oli Featured By Owner Oct 1, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
You have been featured! [link]
Reply
:iconrunningoutofsound:
runningoutofsound Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
As an indigenous person, when I see this kind-of-random collection of painted face, feathers & dreamcatcher, I see what I interpret as "redface".... a person of european descent trying to appear a race that they are not a member of.

In particular, I don't think it's fair for you to take the dreamcatcher and attach your own interpretation to it. It's a sacred thing that has a specific historical & contemporary meaning to a minorities culture. That deserves respect.... appreciating a culture is a good thing, but how you go about showing that appreciation requires a lot of sensitivity and education.

there's a lot of good reads out there about the issue of "cultural appropriation" and the dynamics of it.... I can link a few if you're interested.
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2012
you're definitely not the first one telling me this, and I kind of feel ... well, guilty is not the proper word. rather ashamed. I don't want to justify any of what I did or put it in a better light, I think I'll just think a little more about it next time - it's true when you say that I basically just attached my own interpretation to that dreamcatcher and the feathers and such, it's quite a huge coincidence that it turned out to be like this;

and surely I'm interested, link me to it as soon as you get the time.
Reply
:iconrunningoutofsound:
runningoutofsound Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I took a long time away from this site so I haven't been here to reply to this comment again.

I have to say I appreciate that you felt [something] when confronted on this issue. I basically have given up on trying to engage with people on stuff like this because it seems most people are unmoved and unmoving.

Please know that you are the exception and I respect you for that.

This is a good place to start educating yourself on this stuff

[link]

Thanks
Reply
:iconjjneepinfilms:
JJNeepinFilms Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Professional General Artist
As a First nations person, I don't see a thing wrong w/ this piece. It's exactly as you say, your own interpretation and what you "knew/know" about Native American culture.

Admittedly, it can come off offensive to some, but to me, as an artist, I just see another artist willing to be bold, to learn, to try, to just plain have fun.
Obviously..in the future, it's best to invest some time into cultures' many aspects and "sacred" things. But as I see it..it's art, YOUR art.

Besides..in this day and age..your always gonna offend someone. F*ck em. hehe..
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Jan 20, 2013
aha, you put that quite well. I find that nowadays where everything can be seen from at least twenty point of views, there is never a way to do anything right. so why bother? as long as you did it the way you want it to be, and it truly feels right and suits all your values, then go for it.
Reply
:iconwizard-of-the-arts:
Wizard-of-the-Arts Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
suck a powerful peice! expecially because i have ALOT of trouble with nightmares! i also tend to cling to things that go away the quickest!my life is rather mangled right now! so this text and piture really speak to me! well done!
Reply
:iconpeterohara:
peterohara Featured By Owner Sep 17, 2012
Incredible vision and execution! Truly remarkable!
Reply
:iconchocolatecookiecrumb:
Chocolatecookiecrumb Featured By Owner Sep 12, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Totally fascinating, almost mesmerizing! o.o
Reply
:iconmissemeraldeyes:
MissEmeraldEyes Featured By Owner Sep 10, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
wow, this is absolutely awesome :heart:
I'm totally loving it, can't stop looking :wow:
Reply
:iconmbhenriksen:
MBHenriksen Featured By Owner Sep 9, 2012  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Featured [link] :clap:
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 11, 2012
:heart:
Reply
:icondiamano:
diamano Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012
You've really overdone yourself this time...
The colors, the whole package is amazing!
Getting it as my new screensaver...
Reply
:iconneko-baka-olush:
Neko-Baka-Olush Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012
Oh wow ; v; This is really amazing :3 Just love it *v*
Reply
:icondragonfly-oli:
dragonfly-oli Featured By Owner Sep 5, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Man sollte für dich einen Film drehen. Einen Film über die Träume, die du erschaffst.
Über deine Welt.
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
... das ist so eine der schönsten dinge, die mir jemand seit langem gesagt hat. wirklich.
Reply
:icondragonfly-oli:
dragonfly-oli Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Immer wieder gerne.
Reply
:iconxxeverlongxx:
xXeverlongXx Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2012
sdfhksfjhskh absolutely in love with this photo along with that beautiful description! Amazing!!!!
Reply
:iconblueberryblack:
Blueberryblack Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2012  Student Interface Designer
tolles bild und auch der text ist wirklich sehr sehr gut!
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
vielen dank! :rose:
Reply
:iconiwasoncelikeyou:
IWasOnceLikeYou Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2012  Student General Artist
this is culture appropriation. you are appropriating two cultures that you are not a part of (the blackface and the dreamcatcher) I don't think this is 'interesting' or 'edgy' work. it is most likely that you didn't get that dreamcatcher from native american artisans, and they did not receive the money or credit from the store you bought that from. you are a white-skinned person wearing parts of cultures that has been historically abused and opressed by white people. I urge you to educate yourself on culture appropriation and to not be ignorant.

that being said, in the past I've favourited some things of yours and I love your work. but honestly this is just disheartening.
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2012
... maybe I should first of all point out that I appreciate comments like this to a high level. I really do. it's honest of you and there is barely anything in human communication than honesty and criticism.
however, I've got to say a few things myself to maybe put it right for you and me. and I hope you understand and I don't come off rude.
the thing is, I believe that we both see this in another context. and I'm not saying I am trying to ignore the fact that there was such tragic things as such that happened to the native americans. actually, even though I am aware of the fact that there were such things, I wasn't aware of the symbols that I've used; blackface and dreamcatcher. I saw them in another relation, the blackface is to emphasize the bird look - I got it off a bird's picture where exactly these parts were colored black. the dreamcatcher is a metaphor for other things than this reality. you see, it's a little the "western" interpretation. and I know that to you I as a western person would behave pretty ignorant using such things in a "western context" ... but I doubt that I am using them in any context but mine. I think you've got to separate these two things because apparently, if I wanted to make a photo based on these happenings, or if it was a normal portrait without any background to it, of course, the way I positioned it would be awfully ignorant. but this is something completely different.
I hope you are understanding what I mean. I just wanted to get this straight and I suppose you are not as intolerant and narrow-minded to not understand what I'm trying to put here.
however, I'm up for any more con-arguments and I'd like to listen to your opinion on that..
Reply
:iconiwasoncelikeyou:
IWasOnceLikeYou Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012  Student General Artist
I see where you are coming from, certainly. looking back at my own comment I probably came off as rude, you were not wrong in that aspect.
I'm Canadian and though not Native American, I do know enough about the culture and tradition to know that dream catchers solely originated from Native Americans, and are used sacredly and to their own traditions and superstitions. yes, many artists like to use the dreamcatcher as a symbol, though I believe there are many other alternatives to portraying that same message without it, methods that are not appropriative. for instance, in your photo I think that the blurry white cloud portrayed that dream world well enough, and the dreamcatcher didn't have to be included.
you said that the blackface meant to be the markings of a bird- there are alternatives to that as well, such as differently coloured and marked birds. it would have the exact same impact. don't say that the blackface would have 'added contrast', because that is not true, a brighter colour would have worked fine.
I'm sure that you didn't intend on using oppressive symbols- racism for the most part is wholly unnoticed in everyday life, it is ingrained so deeply into society that we hardly notice it is there sometimes.

overall the use of these racist symbols could be completely avoided, but because culture appropriation and racism is prevalent and passed off as 'not a big deal' it continues to thrive while being largely overlooked.

it's a very interesting issue that you, as an artist, could look more into if you'd like.
Reply
:iconmondglimmer:
Mondglimmer Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2012   Writer
Dir ist klar, wie inspirierend das ist und dass Leute wie ich nicht widerstehen können, etwas damit "anzufangen". ;)

Ich finde es interessant, wie massiv sich der Blickwinkel auf das Bild verändert, wenn man den Text dazu gelesen hat. Im ersten Moment war ich überzeugt, es wären zwei völlig voneinander unanhängige Dinge, aber ich habe mich geirrt.
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
:aww: ich freu mich drauf, jaha! und es freut mich, dass du den text so siehst ... ich weiß nicht, ich möchte nicht, dass menschen sich zu sehr darauf beschränken, auf das, was ich schreibe. jeder soll seine eigene interpretation finden. aber von dem blickwinkel aus betrachtet wie du es sagst, ja, das gefällt mir.
Reply
:iconmondglimmer:
Mondglimmer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012   Writer
the work is in progress. :aww:
Ich find's toll, dass du jedem den Freiraum geben möchtest für eigene Sichtweisen und Interpretationen. Das läd richtig ein, in deine Bilder und Texte einzutauchen, woraus auch neue Dinge entstehen können.
Und mir gefällt es, dass dir mein Blickwinkel jetzt schon gefällt. Weil ich glaube, was ich gerade dazu "verbreche" ist etwas strange und das motiviert. ;)
Reply
:iconbofeng:
BoFeng Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
this is beautiful bro
Reply
:icontayaiv:
tayaiv Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
I almost fainted, this is SO marvelous.
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
Your comments are sometimes so simple and yet my heart melts every time when I read them. Uh. :heart:
Reply
:iconimoushi:
iMoushi Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012
And tonight I will not sleep D; This is oddly creepy
Reply
:iconstarlace:
Starlace Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012   Traditional Artist
Powerful.
Reply
:iconlithium112:
lithium112 Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Breathtaking! x
Reply
:iconxxelynxx:
xxelynxx Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
..... Blowed away
Reply
:iconblauherz:
blauherz Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012
magnificent,
captured a breathtaking moment,
i really love it!
Reply
:iconbeaucyphre:
BeauCyphre Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012  Professional Writer
Scheiße, ist das geil :D! Etwas inhaltlich Ansprechenderes gibt's bald. Bin nur zu alle gerade.
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
:huggle: das freut mich riesig.
Reply
:iconbeaucyphre:
BeauCyphre Featured By Owner Oct 2, 2012  Professional Writer
Einen Monat hab ich gebraucht, um jetzt endlich zu deinem Bild zurück zu finden - sorry, dass es nicht schneller gegangen ist. Und lass dich nicht verunsichern von ein paar pseudo-intellektuellen Kommentaren.
Reply
:iconannalu-chan:
Annalu-Chan Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012
not like i expected. it´s much better!!
Reply
:iconnikolasbrummer:
NikolasBrummer Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
:heart:
Reply
:iconannalu-chan:
Annalu-Chan Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
thx :)
Reply
:iconannalu-chan:
Annalu-Chan Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012
wait why did i wrote thx? weired day...
Reply
:iconroxikf:
Roxikf Featured By Owner Sep 3, 2012
I've been watching your work and I must say,you've evolved so soo much.it's incredible! :)
Reply
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